Under Pressure

David Bowie and Queen’s “Under Pressure” has been in my head lately.

It is a catchy song written and performed by artists with amazing musical talent, but that’s not the reason I can’t get it out of my head…I’m going crazy from the pressure…

I have awesome supporters who I am extremely grateful for, but I was a little surprised this week when I learned that some people don’t understand what I mean when I say, “I’m making a CD.” One of my supporters asked, “How come your album isn’t done yet?” I told him that although I want my album to be finished more than anything, the process is taking much longer than I had hoped because sometimes it’s challenging to figure out lyrics, a melody, acoustic guitar music, electric guitar music (or piano music), and drum music for my songs. And then after the songs are ready, I need to record each part separately because I’m a one-woman band. After I told my supporter this he said, “Oh really? You’re doing it all yourself?”
I shared this story with my friend, and my friend said, “You’re doing it all yourself?” Really??? Why do you think I’ve been acting so frazzled!?! 😉

I hadn’t realized some people didn’t know why this goal of mine was taking so long…but now I do.

I am doing this all on my own, but I want to.

But because I’m making an album on my own, I feel stressed out trying to meet the deadlines that I set for myself.

I made a goal to finish writing the songs for my album by the end or August, but with 9 days left, I’m not sure how close I will get to that goal. My friend asked why I even make deadlines for myself because not meeting the deadlines stresses me out. But the truth is that if I don’t have deadlines, then there’s nothing pushing me to finish it in a timely matter…This whole idea of actually achieving this life long goal is really quite scary!!!

One of my friend’s asked, “When your CD is done, what is your next step?” I explained that I plan to put it on iTunes, and then..I have no idea. I said that I never imagined I would be even making my first CD. I’ve been so focused on writing and recording the songs for TEMPTATION that the idea of what comes after I finish my CD is something I haven’t really had the time to figure out.

Since so much goes into making a CD, sometimes I feel overwhelmed. With that said, I feel so thankful for all of you who viewed last week’s blog post and voted on the picture you thought would make the best cover for TEMPTATION. So far, this photo is in the lead. I really appreciate the help 🙂

Allison Merten Photo by Maison Meredith Photography 9

Allison Merten
Photo by Maison Meredith Photography

Despite the pressure I am feeling to be “inspired” and finish writing the songs for my album in 9 days 😮 tomorrow is another Live Music in the Lounge, and I can’t wait!

Performing for others gives me this sense of aliveness that I only experience when I perform.

So, I’m going to push this stress aside, prepare for tomorrow’s show, and after tomorrow’s show, I’ll get back at writing again 🙂

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